coaltide | One Wank After Another

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2025

One Wank After Another

A blank assignment is a funny thing, isn't it? When you have it, you don't appreciate it, and when you miss it, it's gone.

Wednesday 10 December: Default deadline (9pm UTC)
Wednesday 17 December: Assignment deadline (9pm UTC)
Wednesday 24 December: Main collection works reveals (9pm UTC)
Thursday 25 December: Madness collection works reveals (9pm UTC)
Thursday 1 January: Author reveals, end of event (9pm UTC)

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Yuletide Discord for Hippos & Exchanges After Dark for namespace ~~drama~~ 18+ discussion.

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No one wants to write my canons in Yuletide any more than in any other exchange, so it is in fact actually the same.

Really? Has an exchange ever gone unrevealed for you?

No, but I have caused delays.

But did someone write you a PH eventually?

Yes, because that's how exchanges work, like we've been saying. You can request Winterblumensaat, Fruhlingblumensaat, and Sommerblumensaat, and even though no one wants to pick up any of them, someone will eventually write you a fic for one of your tiny, individual canoe fandoms.

Then saying "no one wants to write my canons in Yuletide any more than in any other exchange" is inaccurate. Most pinch hitters actually don't pick up a PH they don't want to pick up. No one is forcing us to do it!

No one is forcing you to do it in Yuletide either so what the fuck are you on about Willis

Telling the coalie above that it's just not true that no one wants to write their canons. In Yuletide or in any other exchanges! Are you lost?

Parent all the way up to "It might be a grudgingly-written minimum by someone who just wants the exchange to open already, who might or might not have done more than read a summary, and meanwhile everyone is griping behind your back about how the exchange is always delayed and it's always the same few people causing it, but sure, you technically do get a fic that's technically in your fandom! because it's guaranteed by the rules!

...people can see why that's not actually the same as matching with someone in yuletide who actually wants to write for you, right?"

Does that grudgingly-written kittyfic written by wankers sounds like "people want to write this" to you?

I'm not denying that the grudgingly-written kittyfic exists, because it totally does. But that's definitely the exception and not the rule. Most pinch hitters take their PHs seriously as any assignment, IME, and I know I'm not the only one who thinks this!

O...kay, well, my point is that nobody is offering my fandoms in Yuletide any more than they are offering them in any other exchange, and I'm just as likely to get kittyfic in either PH scenario, so Yuletide is not a special time when the magic fairy who wants to write for me appears.

Re: Unpopular Opinion Time

(Anonymous) - 2025-11-12 10:49 (UTC) - Expand

DC

I've had extremely mixed luck with PHers who picked up my fandom for the PH, ranging from AI fic (yes, really) to "the PHer clearly gave the canon and honest shake but didn't vibe with it and the resulting fic shows it", to "the PHer loved it and now they offer it regularly".

I should say I do an above-average number of so some of my rare fandoms spend a lot of time on the PH list, and my requests get a lot of visibility as a result. So while it kind of paid off for me, I think you also need a lot of tries to get lucky, and most gifts by someone who picked up the canon so the collection could open already might be well-meaning, but very much not what people are hoping to get when they sign up requesting that fandom in an exchange where it might already be known. Of course, you're never guaranteed good fic, but I really wouldn't tout "just be stubborn and linger on the PH list a long" as an actually viable way to get fic by someone who is enthusiastic to write what you're requesting.

DC

You're misunderstanding their point. The claim above is that Yuletide is special because even when your fandoms are rare, there's always someone else who's into them and is eager to write for you. Unlike all the other exchanges where the PH will linger until someone reluctantly picks it up.

CYRT is saying (and I agree) that Yuletide is not different for some of us because no one else is into our rare fandoms.

CYRT is saying (and I agree) that Yuletide is not different for some of us because no one else is into our rare fandoms.

I'm not misunderstanding, but I disagree. I asked if coalie had ever not received a gift to make the point that someone is always into someone else's rare fandoms. YT being so massive would actually make it different in the speed a PH for one of those rare fandoms would be picked up, but they always do and always will. Yes, sometimes it will get kittyfic, but a regular assignment might too.

The only way I would agree with "no one else is into our rare fandoms" is if a PH was left unclaimed forever because no one knew it/was willing to get into it. And that never happens. I got into beloved fandoms via picking up PHs that sounded intriguing, and I'm hardly the only one. I get the frustration of being a PH, but if you think about the way some PHs are claimed within minutes, even for super rare fandoms, you might change your mind.

/rambling pinch hitter thoughts

No, you're misunderstanding.

We're not frustrated about being a PH. But being a PH with three fandoms-of-one in Yuletide vs. being a PH with three fandoms-of-one in Hurt/Comfort Ex is exactly the same for me. Some will eventually pick of the PH, consume my canon and write me gift fic (I've never received one that seemed like kittyfic). And yes, the ideal scenario is that the pinch hitter will fall in love with the fandom and then offer it henceforth. But the point is that they only picked up the fandom because we were a pinch hit. It's not like coalie above claimed that in Yuletide, other people are already into it and offering, and in other exchanges that won't happen. That's a false dichotomy.

DC

I see what you're saying since it's clear from even just a quick perusal of the sign-up summary that a vast majority of fandoms will be lucky to have one other person willing to write for them; many fandoms of one sadly do not suddenly jump in popularity no matter how large the creator pool is. However, I will say that I have gotten a few offers on things in Yuletide that I never did the rest of the year because the people who only do Yuletide and ignore the rest of the exchange circuit (like I used to) did show up to offer for it (I know because half the time my writers are people I've never seen anywhere else but Yuletide). Also, I've noticed that I hit the pinch hit list far less in Yuletide than I do in most other exchanges, even allowing for some of them being tag-based, which limits you further. But yeah, it's not a universal experience and there are some fandoms that I've requested that haven't gotten written in any exchange, no matter how many people sign up or pinch hit.

DC

Some will eventually pick of the PH, consume my canon and write me gift fic (I've never received one that seemed like kittyfic).

But you can't know that that's exactly what happened. You cannot judge from the sign-up summary how many people actually know and are passionate about the fandom you're requesting, and unless a PHer says "I consumed your canon for this and it was fun!", you can't know someone's level of prior familiarity when they fill your PH.

Most if not all PHs I've picked up in Yuletide (or other exchanges for that matter) were fandoms I already knew and was passionate about but did not offer! There could be many reasons I did not offer them, ranging from not noticing they had requests, to not feeling confident or flexible enough to offer them without knowing the details of the sign-up, to forgetting they even existed (or that I had strong feelings for them) until I saw a particular request or prompt for them. Maybe I need to do some canon review but the enthusiasm is already there.

Yuletide IS different and I'd wager that PHs get snapped up so quickly not because PHers for it are so eager to get into new canons, but because the collective level of canon familiarity AND passion extends way, way beyond what actually ends up showing as Offers! This is triply true in an exchange where requests aren't visible in advance, which leads many people to offer much more conservatively than they would otherwise!

SC I should be more specific, I think it is possible to know someone picked up your canon without being told outright, but not in Yuletide. In smaller exchanges and with regular exchange participants, you get a sense of what fandoms someone is familiar with both from what they request and comment on but also chatter over Discord and the like. Like, if someone goes eyes emoji at you posting a fandom promo in a Discord thread and writes you a PH in that fandom a few months later, it's not rocket science to figure it out.

I think most Yuletide PHs (except for very late PHs, potentially) are written by people who already know the thing (even if they need to do canon review), while PHs in small exchanges are dramatically more likely to be picked up by someone intending to consume or who recently consumed the canon.

cyrt

Some will eventually pick of the PH, consume my canon and write me gift fic (I've never received one that seemed like kittyfic).

But you can't know that that's exactly what happened

Yes, I can, because writers talk about this in author's notes and when we talk in the comments afterwards?

Obviously, if you already knew and loved the canon, you wouldn't, but in the opposite case, "I saw your prompts and was intrigued about the canon" is a incredibly common thing to say. (It's a bit awkward when they tell you they were into your ship but thought the canon was sooo bad and it's about a canon you're earnestly fond of, but them's the breaks.)

sc

Though I request the same fandoms all year round, so "I picked it up because of your PH" doesn't usually mean "I picked it up because your Yuletide PH was lingering" but rather "I picked it up because I frequently saw you go to PH with this fandom in the past".

NC A single data point, but most of my authors have actually said in an author's note (or in a reply to my comments) that they picked up my canon just to write for me. Yes, even in Yuletide. One author did say they had consumed the canon previously, but it had been decades, so they had to fully re-consume it to pick up my PH. Several have said they'd never heard of any of my fandoms before. (Phrased in a positive way, I should add, like 'it was so fun consuming this canon for you, I had never heard of it before!')

NC I can personally vouch for the fact that I've picked up multiple canons for assignments, including cases where I matched on a more popular canon (or picked up a pinch hit for a more popular canon!) and had enough difficulty getting started that I decided to just try it from a different angle via starting a new canon.

DC

Yes, sometimes [the PH] will get kittyfic, but a regular assignment might too.

Doubt.jpg

For a regular assignment to get kittyfic, it would have be someone deliberately offering a fandom they haven't consumed. Sure, never say never and all that, but I would say that's dramatically unlikely to happen compared to kittyfic written to fill a PH (which is also where the term originates).

DC

Has kittyfic become a general term for bad gift fics? That's a shame, if so. It filled a specific role.

What about someone who matched on a different fandom, then realized they couldn't write it but didn't want to default?

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