coalcube: (Default)
coalie ([personal profile] coalcube) wrote in [community profile] coaltide2021-12-24 07:37 pm
Entry tags:

Don't Stop Coal Now!

Tonight I'm gonna have myself a real coal time
I feel alive
And the exchange I'll turn it inside out, yeah
I'm floating around in agony
So, (don't stop me now)
(Don't stop me)
'Cause I'm having a coal time, having a coal time~


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Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:11 pm (UTC)(link)
AYRT

Genuinely, how so? "Coal" just means "it's a present I don't enjoy". It's not a useless definition as such.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
ayrt

I mean, I guess? It's just not how I use the word or how I usually understand other people to use the word, and IMO it doesn't follow naturally from the metaphor. If you ask for a toy in your stocking and get coal, that's not just "a present you don't enjoy." Coal in this day and age would be a pretty useless and spiteful-feeling gift! To me a gift that's just not what you wanted but not actively terrible would be like... socks or a toothbrush.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, in years past we've used metaphors like scratchy sweaters or boring socks to describe fic that was disappointing or bland but not horrible or spiteful.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:34 pm (UTC)(link)
AYRT

I guess I just don't personally see the difference between coal and a toothbrush as a present. I don't really care about authorial intent. A story the recip doesn't enjoy is a story the recip doesn't enjoy, whether the author tried their best or wrote spitefic. As a recipient, it's often impossible to tell whether a disappointing gift has been given in good faith or not, so I don't see the point in guessing. The only thing you can know for sure is how you feel about the gift, so it makes more sense to define a gift by how you feel and not how you think the author felt writing it.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
As a recipient, it's often impossible to tell whether a disappointing gift has been given in good faith or not

Not even slightly true, wtf.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Tell us your mind-reading secret then, please!

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Recip asked for A/B ship fic, case fic, and happy endings.

Fic 1: A and B interact like in canon, in a casefic, but the only shipping is a somewhat unsatisfactory "hey, want to go out for coffee later?" at the end.

Fic 2: Character B is hit by a bus, and character A and canon het love interest solve the case of B's gruesome death while wearing no homo shirts.

You really telling me you need mind-reading powers to tell the difference between good faith and spite fic?

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:00 pm (UTC)(link)
dc

I also received A&B fic when I asked for A/B fic and I would have been thrilled with scenario #1.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:03 pm (UTC)(link)
dc

Be fair, coalie. Some exchange participants genuinely are that dim.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Ayrt

But not all fics in the wild will be that obvious.

Fic 3: A case fic where A & B interact, and at the end A tells B "you're my best friend, you're like a brother to me".

Fic 4: A/B shipfic where they solve a case and hook up, but at the end decide they shouldn't date because work and relationships don't mix.

I'd either of those spitefic? Maybe they're both given in good faith and author 3 tried to give them as much of their likes as they could, or maybe they saw the request and said "they ship A/B? Gross! I'll show them!" Maybe author 4 thinks solving the case and remaining partners is a happy ending, or maybe they know that the "they won't date" is as far from a happy ending for the recip as possible. I maintain that in practice, you often can't tell failed good faith attempts apart from authors who don't care about pleasing their recips.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:13 pm (UTC)(link)
If 3 stopped at "you're my best friend" that would be good faith. Adding the line about being a brother instantly makes it purposefully stomping on their ship.

4 would depend on the tone for more context.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I would argue that it is very hard to know for sure when something is spitefic because sometimes people are earnestly just very, very dumb. (For a famous example: dewclaws did not seem to be intentionally spiteficcy, but is still insanely WTF). But I definitely agree that most disappointing fic is disappointing for reasons that do not involve a middle finger to the recip, and in those cases they are almost certainly good faith.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:37 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah. "Coal" implies either spite or incompetence. "Well, this was okay, but I didn't like it" is more like underpants. White cotton underpants.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:21 pm (UTC)(link)
+1

Yeah, I tend to think of coal as "holy shit, that was crap" -- either because the writer went totally against the recipient's wants in a really clear way, or execution that is just ridiculously poor.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 10:47 pm (UTC)(link)
I disagree. Over the years I've received plenty of good faith gifts that were coal for me. It doesn't have to have been spiteful or incompetent to make me miserable when I see it there on my Gifts page and remember the disappointment all over again.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 11:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Then you're too delicate to participate in exchanges.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 11:10 pm (UTC)(link)
+ 0.5

All my worst gifts were probably good faith attempts. But if something makes me miserable to see on my gifts page, I reject without regret (and I would hope that a recipient I inadvertently made unhappy does the same thing).

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 12:46 am (UTC)(link)
Wow, I flinched reading this. You do you, but I wouldn't reject a gift unless it was actually offensive, not just something I disliked. It's Yuletide, and you got a present from your hippie aunt who just knew you'd want hand-crocheted yak-fur menstrual pads, and she crocheted them herself. You grimace and thank her and throw them away privately. You do not tell your aunt about how you feel, and that's what the reject button does.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
Then tell me, how does one privately get rid the fic so that I never have to look at it again?

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
It makes them miserable, coalie. Why do you want them to keep it?

(I think it's weird if people "curate" their gifts page so that it only has stuff they REALLY like or can bear other people to think they're into, but this may be a hypothetical evil unicorn situation and possibly no one actually does that.)

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 02:25 am (UTC)(link)
I really don't like that AO3 doesn't offer any middle ground between throwing the hand-crocheted llama fur pads in her face, and putting them on display on the mantel. There really should be an option for saying a graceful thank you and then tucking them in the drawer in the guest room closet, never to be seen again. I wish we at least had the option of setting our gifts page private, so people don't have to worry that people will judge them for the gifts they've had.

(I also wish the people who want their gifts page to be a perfect gem-box of only things they love most of all would learn to use bookmarks instead.)

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
AYRT You are absolutely right.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-26 07:13 am (UTC)(link)
Ayrt

Comparing real life gifts from family and friends to fic exchange gifts is never very useful. Not only does AO3 have no option to "throw away privately", but the etiquette is also very different. When I get a terrible gift from a relative (or vice versa), we'll talk about it so it won't happen again. "Okay, look, I know you meant well, I love you, but please don't ever gift me the fic equivalent of menstrual pads again, and now let's get drunk and forget about it" is not a thing you can say to your Yuletide author.

If you don't want to reject exchange gifts ever even when you hate them, then you don't have to. But other people feel differently, and that's what the exchange button is for.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) - 2021-12-26 16:32 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) - 2021-12-26 16:35 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) - 2021-12-26 17:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) - 2021-12-26 17:56 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) - 2021-12-27 00:47 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 11:49 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm glad there's a Refuse Gift option now for your sake! But yeah, if a good faith gift makes you miserable, that's setting you up for a lot of misery.

Re: Who Got Coal

(Anonymous) 2021-12-25 09:23 pm (UTC)(link)
No, it usually has a more specific "widely agreed to be a bad move on the writer's part" definition.