coaltide | The Coalies Are Back In Town

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2021

The Coalies Are Back In Town

Friday night they'll be dressed to kill
Down at Coaltide Bar'n'Grill
The receipts will flow and wank will spill
And if the coalies wanna fight, you better let 'em
That jukebox in the corner blastin' out my favorite song
The nights are getting longer, it won't be long
Won't be long 'til Yuletide comes
Now that the coalies are here again

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Default deadline: Sat 11 Dec
Assignment deadline: Sat 18 Dec
Reveals: Sat 25 Dec

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Also, dewclaws person is guaranteed to respond to the dewclaws DNW by just upping the crazy beyond what you could possibly imagine, not by actually writing something reasonable.

+1000. Someone who's more interested in writing whatever the hell they want than in giving you a gift you're going to like can't be stopped by DNWs, no matter how many you have or how carefully you think through your phrasing. IME, it's better to focus on communicating your preferences as if your assigned writer is going to be a conscientious participant who's going to try their best to make you happy - like 95% of the time, that will be true, and you'll be happier if you just write the other 5% off as a loss instead of spending a lot of time agonizing over how to prevent it from your end, when the problem's on the other end.

I mean, these wtf cases are split basically between - a) someone who has a moral! issue! with you or your DNW, and is going to figure out a way to show they don't approve (poly lecture person, run over by ambulance person) - that case you're probably safer without the DNW at all; b) someone who doesn't think yuletide is about tailoring a gift specifically for you, it's just about matching on a fandom, in which case they will probably follow DNWs more or less but you probably still won't get your perfect fic; c) someone who legitimately thinks they are writing a story you will like and just has absolutely no theory of mind (dewclaws).

In none of those situations is making your DNWs broader or more extensive going to get you the writer you wish you'd gotten. (They're just going to increase the chances the writer you'd wish you'd gotten will take one look at your DNW list, go 'too much hassle', and default.)

What was the ambulance fic?

The tl;dr - "beatrice_otter - took a request for m/m, wrote m/f awesome ladies with the other half of the m/m pairing getting run over by an ambulance."

https://coaltide.dreamwidth.org/256.html?thread=998144#cmt998144
https://coaltide.dreamwidth.org/1966.html?thread=4742318#cmt4742318
https://yuletide-coal.dreamwidth.org/8396.html?thread=31250124#cmt31250124

The tl;dr does tend to imply that the problem was that the writer didn't like m/m, which is untrue; I suspect it's more that the person who got run over by an ambulance is a [possibly implied to be neo-Nazi] terrorist.

Still not good! Could still have just not offered the terrorist! But I don't think it was a het vs. slash thing, I think it was a "does not ship villains" thing.

Villain or not, b_o still took a request for slash, turned it into het, and killed half the requested pairing. Sorry if people ~misunderstood~ that it's not slash she doesn't like, it's villains!

Also, it's fucking Hans Gruber from Die Hard. Terrorist, definitely. Neo-Nazi is a reach.

It was a request for slash and/or gen with canon het, she wrote the canon het. Like the shipping is not the problem here, it's the gleeful murder of the favorite character, and it's weird that coal always talks about it like it's the shipping. if she'd written it as hateslash and still gleefully run the guy over, requester would probably still have been (rightfully) upset.)

(Which I guess is another reason to point out that elaborate DNW lists don't fix things like this - she would almost certainly have respected a no het DNW. And still gleefully run him over.)

Because that's how the apparent recip characterized it?

The original anon comment-

https://fail-fandomanon.dreamwidth.org/211178.html?thread=1165607146#cmt1165607146

Dear author,

I'm still slightly amazed that you took my request for slash, or shippy gen or even just the two male characters talking to each other, as permission to write 2000 words of ~AWESOME LADIES~ with bonus judgement of the pairing I was hoping for AND sneering over my favourite character from that canon thrown in.

Their original request-

https://doreyg.livejournal.com/336879.html

For John McClane, Hans Gruber with a "Holly isn’t on my list of characters in the prompt, but I’d love it if she was at least mentioned. There’s no need for her and John to get back together, they might even work better as friends who enjoy poking at each other, but I do really like her character and would quite like for her to make at least a brief appearance. Because yay, awesome lady! ^^" caveat.

So a request for slash or shippy gen with a please don't bash the canon het ex-wife request.

So... the request said "yay, awesome lady!" and the recip was... mad that she took that as permission to write Awesome Ladies fic...? And even after the prompt was dug up that's what we put in the tl;dr summary?

Like I'm not on b_o's side on this one either but that consistent focus on the awesome lady part has a distinct whiff of unrelated grudge. And as part of a discussion on letter-writing... Don't put "yay awesome lady" in your letter if you don't want awesome ladies, I guess, even if there is an annoying push for it that year, you might get matched with the annoying leader of the annoying push.

("There's no need for them to get back together" reads to me as "canon het is great but not required" especially since Holly wasn't even in the tagset so why bring it up otherwise, but I guess I can see how recip thought they were saying the opposite.)

The excerpt about Holly is one part, at the end, of the request the majority of which is all about Hans/John. No to mention they put character bashing in their DNWs- to me, in combination that reads as please don't turn the canon ex-wife the character has positive feelings for into an ooc raging bitch he was glad to divorce.

I guess it's a lesson in don't give your writer het outs when you really want at least shippy gen for a slash pairing.

Yeah I mean there's a lot wrong with that story! But "writer used the het out" isn't one of them.

...and if they had a character bashing DNW then I feel like "gleefully turning requested character into a smear on the ground" is a pretty definite DNW violation there.

*sweats*

/original link fairy who copied the tldr because it seemed good enough

I was complaining about coal as an anonymous mass, not you, fairy! No worries!

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The Coalies Are Back In Town

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