coaltide | Morbane's coal

In quantum wankchanics, Morbane's coal is a thought experiment, sometimes described as a paradox, of quantum wankerposition. In the thought experiment, a hypothetical gift may be considered simultaneously both the fic of your dreams (TFOYD) and coal, while it is unread state, as a result of its fate being linked to a random subatomic event that may or may not occur.

The Coaltide interpretation implies that, after a while, the gift is simultaneously TFOYD and coal. Yet, when a coalie clicks on their gift, the coalie sees the gift either TFOYD or coal, not both TFOYD and coal. This poses the question of when exactly quantum wankerposition ends and reality resolves into one possibility or the other.

Madness Opens: Tuesday 26 December
Author Reveals: Monday 1 January

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If they treat you and you hate it, don't comment on the treat.

You are aware that exchanges are anonymous? You won't know the treat you hate is from the same person who's already gifted you something (possibly multiple somethings) you hated before.

So it's just another gift you hate. Which you say you should comment positively on and move on. You'll only notice after reveals that it was from them, and by then you've already said "thanks, I love it". Is your suggestion to delete the comment? Because, frankly, that would be bizarre.

And then you do the same thing with the next gift from them, and the next, and the next ten. Congrats, you're now exclusively getting gifts from someone whose writing you hate, and you've ensured that they spend a lot of time writing for someone who secretly hates what they give them, all the while you clap yourself on the shoulder and tell yourself that you contributed to the nice, pleasant atmosphere in exchanges.

You do you. But I sure as hell hope your and my paths never cross in exchanges or out of them.

You have invented a problem which does not exist because your actual problem is that you want something from exchanges that they can't provide. Good luck!

I’m sorry you’ve been so burdened with a cluelessly well-meaning treater who follows you from exchange to exchange writing you heaps of badfic.

Didn't we literally just have wank about LadyKatana in this exact post?

There was definitely someone else who did this more recently, too, but I don't remember what exchange it was. Someone rejected something and then they gifted like 3 or 4 more treats and were beating themself up in public in some kind of humiliation fetish thing.

Oh god, them.

Yeah, they were all over ffa, but they were such an extreme case I don't think you can extrapolate much from that behavior. Everyone was telling them to leave the poor recipient alone.

Morbane's coal

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