coaltide | Morbane's coal

In quantum wankchanics, Morbane's coal is a thought experiment, sometimes described as a paradox, of quantum wankerposition. In the thought experiment, a hypothetical gift may be considered simultaneously both the fic of your dreams (TFOYD) and coal, while it is unread state, as a result of its fate being linked to a random subatomic event that may or may not occur.

The Coaltide interpretation implies that, after a while, the gift is simultaneously TFOYD and coal. Yet, when a coalie clicks on their gift, the coalie sees the gift either TFOYD or coal, not both TFOYD and coal. This poses the question of when exactly quantum wankerposition ends and reality resolves into one possibility or the other.

Madness Opens: Tuesday 26 December
Author Reveals: Monday 1 January

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People say "It's the thought that counts" about gifts that are objectively terrible to excuse their terribleness, not to pretend that they aren't terrible.

people say "it's the thought that counts" when telling their three-year-olds to say thank you even if they don't like the snowman sweatshirt uncle bob gave them, and most toddlers grasp this better than nonnies insisting it's normal and fine to reject fics they didn't like.

It... it's fine to not like the snowman sweatshirt that doesn't fit. You say thank you, and then when Uncle Bob leaves, you take it to Goodwill.

quickly, for a dollar, what do you think is under debate in this thread

Whether it's ~unforgivably rude~ to reject the gift.

projecting and wrong. sad!

No, Donald, I'm not wrong.

indeed you are <3

Nope.

i'm not wrong! i'm not wrong! i'm not wrong! wahhhhhh

As you turn into a corncob?

and your kernels are so fresh and so so so tasty

Who said it doesn't fit? But thank you for making it clear that your petulant immaturity is so undeniable you need to invent additional conditions for a metaphor to make yourself sound more reasonable.

Touch grass, you flailing weirdo.

NO U

Morbane's coal

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